When you are a parent, it is common to feel like you should no longer be your own top priority, especially when it comes to how you spend your time and money. In many ways it is true - you should of course put the needs of your children and your family home above the things you want the majority of the time. But this can lead you to feeling guilty whenever you buy anything for yourself, or do anything that is only for your own enjoyment. In reality, this can be a bad way to look at things. Just because you have responsibilities and people who depend on you, that doesn't mean that you have to live and work just for other people 100% of the time! Equally, if buying yourself a treat makes you feel happier and more confident, you'll be better equipped to make the people who matter most to you happy too!
So, how can you make sure you know when it is a good time to let yourself buy something you really want, and do it without feeling guilty?
Purchases You Can Justify
If you can justify to yourself that the thing you want to buy is something that you will get a lot of use out of and will appreciate having, rather than a frivolous purchase just for the mood lift that comes with shopping, you are far more likely to have positive feelings about the money you spent after you buy the item.
Consider that sometimes a treat isn't something you want but don't need, but sometimes can be buying a nicer version of an essential. One example could be replacing your worn out old sneakers. Certainly, you could just buy a cheap pair of unbranded ones you don't especially like just so you have some to wear, but this could be a time when you could justify spending more money and treating yourself to a pair of Gucci sneakers, or sneakers from another high end brand that you really love, and which you'll feel special every time you wear.
Head over to SSENSE to see the latest lines in sneakers from luxury labels including Gucci for ideas. In this way, you are getting something you do need, and will use a lot, but it is also a gorgeous luxury item that will make you feel good. This can be much easier to justify to yourself than, for example, buying a pair of high-end stilettos you may only wear once a year instead.
Treat Yourself When You're Buying Essentials for Everyone Else
Another good way to get the most enjoyment out of treating yourself without feeling guilty is to do it when you are already buying things for your kids. Treat yourself to something equivalent to what they are getting, and you can all enjoy the fun of having something new together. Certainly, you probably won't want something that is exactly the same as what they are getting, but you can be creative if that is the case. Buy yourself a new pair of jeans when you're buying some for them, but maybe when you buy them a new backpack for school, you could get yourself a new purse, or when you're in the bookshop picking up books they need for school, you could get yourself a novel in your favorite genre to read in bed.
Reward Yourself for Meeting Personal Goals
A third way that you can make sure that when you get something you want, you only have positive feelings about buying it for yourself, is to offer yourself the item as a reward for doing something else. If you have some personal goals you are working towards at the moment, for instance you are trying to lose weight or get fitter, you are studying for something, or you are trying to learn a difficult new skill like a foreign language, then you can associate buying the thing you want to treat yourself to with meeting one of the goals along your way.
Setting good goals that help you break down your progress isn't just an important part of staying accountable when you want to get somewhere, but it is also a chance to celebrate the smaller milestones. That new lipstick or phone or bag you want can be part of celebrating something you worked hard to do, and then you'll definitely feel good about deserving it!
As you can see, there are a few ways you can silence the little voice that says you shouldn't be treating yourself or spending money when you really want something new. Why not give these ideas a try and get more enjoyment every time you shop for yourself!
4 September 2019
